Nyra pov

Today is the day the first guy is coming to see me. I had taken a leave as per my father's instruction. My mother woke me up early in the morning so that I will be ready on time. As if they are giving free tickets to Manali. Sigh. Such a boring life I am living in. I was wearing a simple saree. It was a simple pink organza saree. I had braided my hair. And did simple makeup.

I was pacing the room from one end to another end burning a hole on the ground. My mother even asked me to cook food so that they will be impressed. As if. I don't know how to feel about all of this. Maybe I should just go with the flow.

After getting scolded by my mother, I cooked Upma and Kesari bath. It is a South Indian breakfast. Upma is cooked using sooji and some vegetables are added and cooked. Whereas kesari bath is also cooked using sooji rava but it is a dessert. It will be sweet. And we can even put some dry fruits and even pineapple too.

Good morning pineapple. Looking very good, very nice.

I can't believe I am thinking this in this crucial situation. I think I have lost my mind completely. My parents asked me to do puja and pray for everything to go well. I did everything as they told me to and was waiting for the guy and his family to arrive. It was 10 in the morning when they came. My friends insisted that they will be with me for moral support. But I refused them because I know they will do something which will get me into trouble.

First when they came in, they all sat in the living room and were talking with my parents. I was standing inside the kitchen and was trying to listen to what they were saying. First they just spoke about anything and everything. Then they came to the main topic, which is my marriage. My mother called me to bring the breakfast along with me.

Me being a drama queen came slowly holding the plate looking down, acting like a shy seedi saadi girl. Which I am not by the way.

I gave the breakfast plate to his parents first, then I went near him and gave it to him.

"Jal lijiye." I said giving water to the guy. I can win an Oscar at this rate. I turned and glanced around everyone looking impressed with my acting. Whereas my brother was giving me looks as if I am dancing holding pom poms.

After that my mother gestured to me to sit beside her. I don't even know his name. I think my parents forgot to mention it. Or maybe I forgot. My mother was trying very hard to impress them and was praising him, whereas I was just watching ganji chudail reel. Then I saw that guy. He was good looking. But I didn't feel anything. I have felt more feelings for a stranger in the middle of the crowd than this guy.

Even now I have not heard his name. Let's give him a name.

What shall I name him ? How about a pookie? He is such a pookie coded. He was very much shy and was sitting very close to his mother as if , if he leaves her he will get lost. Or else I can name goodie two shoes. How about 'He , whose name I don't know.' What am I even thinking? I should be trying to find the invisible connection I have with this guy. But here I am thinking about what to call him.

Then they started eating the food and that guy did not even glance at me once. He is very much interested in looking towards the ground. Maybe he liked our house's granite tiles.

My mother and his mother were busy talking about serials whereas my father and his father were talking about politics. We both were sitting awkwardly as if we were forced to sit in front of our relatives just for the sake of our parents.

"Nyra, do you know how to sing ?" His mother asked. I am getting annoyed now. Who asks these kinds of questions in this era. I turned to my parents and gave them a look. But they were just smiling and not at all bothered. Do they want me to marry this kind of guy?

"No aunty, I am not good at it." I said, giving her a fake smile.

"Arey you don't know how to sing? That's bad." She said and turned her face to the side making me feel dumb for not knowing.

"Aunty, do you know how to perform c section surgery?" I asked her, gritting my teeth to stop myself from saying bad words to her.

"Nahi beta. How can I know ?" She said laughing like I asked the most absurd question to her.

"How can you not know aunty? What if there is an emergency and no doctor is available?" I said slowly in a scolding manner but in reality I wanted to throw something on her head.

"Nyra, you are very funny." I think she understood what I was trying to do and looked around awkwardly. Then turned towards her husband who was looking as though he was so done with her. Whereas he was just looking down the floor as if it was very interesting.

It was very awkward for a while. And my parents were glaring at me as if I committed a crime. My father cleared his throat and spoke.

"From that time we all are speaking, I think we should let them talk and get to know each other." And gestured to me to take him to a room.

I stood and turned towards him.

"Can I go and talk with her Amma?" He asked his mother. Then I realized that he is mama's boy.

There is nothing wrong with it. But there is a certain limit for that. And after marriage I have seen these kinds of guys who won't support their wife and that's so sad.

"Haan, go and talk, Chiru. My son won't do anything without my permission." She said and patted his back. Oh, I am getting intrusive thoughts going on in my mind which I don't want to think about.

He came and we both started walking towards my room. After going inside we sat side to side not speaking anything.

"Do you like me ?" I asked him because I don't think he will talk even if the whole day is given.

"If my mother liked you I would marry you." He answered, still not looking towards me.

"I am asking for your opinion."

"My mother's opinion is my opinion."

I rolled my eyes at him. What kind of guys my parents are looking for me. They want me to marry him. Next he will ask his mother's permission to touch me. Whatever. I won't marry him anyway.

"Then I think there is nothing to talk about, we should just go out of here." I said annoyed.

"Yes we should." And stood up and went to open the door.

We both went inside and sat as we were sitting before.

"Do you like my daughter beta?" My father asked him.

"Actually your daughter is beautiful. But you know the problem is your daughter doesn't know how to sing. Which is very unfortunate." His mother said sweetly, smiling at us. Her smile faker than my snake school friends.

"We are ready to give more gifts." My mother said in desperation as though he is the only guy left on this planet. Before my mother could speak another word, my father spoke.

"I think you all should leave. Maybe they are not meant to be together." My father said without any expression on his face.

Then that lady got angry and started spouting nonsense.

"We don't even want to have a relationship with a family like yours." His mother said and went away dragging him.

I felt sorry for him. For the way he is getting treated by his mother. After the whole fiasco they left.

"She has the audacity to reject my daughter just because she doesn't know how to sing. My daughter is very good. That's the reason she is a doctor today." When he was saying these things I felt bad about the way I am. I don't know from where the guilt came and hit me.

Yeah I studied hard and became a doctor. But I am not as ideal as they think I am. Sometimes I feel guilty for the way I am. Many times I lie to them and also I do things which they don't want me to. I know they do everything for my well being. But sometimes I want to be myself without any restrictions. But that doesn't mean I do anything and everything. I have set some limits which I won't cross.

"Don't worry more about this. I will find you a very good guy. And give you a good life."

"Appa you have already given me a good life."

"I know. Now I am here to look after you but what about when I am gone? I want someone to look after you." He said caressing my head.

"Appa don't speak like that." I said sleeping on his shoulders. My eyes were filled with tears.

"Okay go and take a rest putta (Sweetheart). Everything will be alright." And he went outside.

My mother patted my head and went to the kitchen. Before she could go inside I called her back.

"Amma, are you really that desperate to send me away?" I asked her, my voice cracking towards the end.

"It's not like that beta. They have a big name here. And if they spread some bad rumors about you, it would be difficult for us to find a good guy." She tried convincing me. Is it a good reason for me to marry off for that kind of a guy?

"I don't want to talk Maa." I said and went towards my room without trying to prove my point.

As soon as I entered, the lavender smell hit me as I had lit the candle. But even that was not enough for me to calm me down. I threw all my jewelry I was wearing haphazardly on the dressing mirror and fell on the bed.

Tears fell from my eyes onto the bed and I made no effort to wipe it. I silently cried and I felt lonelier than ever.

I didn't know my mother was this desperate to send me away. I thought they wanted me to stay forever with them because they refused to send me to a different state.

As I was wallowing in self pity. I phone dinged indicating that I have received a notification.

Bolo Zubaan Kesari

Azara : How did it went girl ?

Me : Shit.

Adira : What happened girl?

Me : I don't want to talk about it now. I will message you all later.

And then I silently cried for some more time and I felt tired with all of this and slept.

***

After waking up from that power nap, I tried to remember where I was and what had happened. Then at once everything hit me and my shoulders sagged with sadness. Then I wanted to talk with someone and clear my mind. So I decided to call my friends.

Then we four did a conference call and I told them the whole story. Even though they sometimes act like brainless clowns, when I am sad or face some issues with my family they are the only people who listen to me and give me advice and console me.

After talking for hours, I felt a bit better. I had not completely forgotten about my mother but somewhat I was calm.

Then I went down, I slept till evening and I am surprised no one woke me up. The dinner was very awkward. Except for the clinging sound of the utensils everything was silent. And I can't forget the sound of my brother chewing annoyingly loud. In the middle I glared at me to stop that sound but he started doing it louder.

Then my father gave him a look and he became silent.

After eating I was about to sleep. When I received a notification.

What do you think about the groom ? What might be the notification?